Manssentials #7: Keeping Your Word

While the days of knights going out and fighting in hand-to-hand combat are long gone, women still say that they want their "knight in shining armor."

First, let's break down the analogy a bit. The term knight brings to mind certain words: noble, chilvarlous, gentleman, gallant. To be a knight, one had to be born a noble, and then go through the process of being a squire, or knight's apprentice, to prove themselves worthy of being a knight. While all knights wore armor, the attention to detail to make it shine would help the knight to stand out to the ladies.

One way to bring those knightly qualities out today, is by doing something that, in theory, is simple. It doesn't seem hard to say that you are going to do something and actually do it. Why, then, does is to be such a rare trait these days?

In my opinion, a lot of guys just say they will do something to get whoever is asking to leave them alone. They don't really care about the task, they just want to get back to whatever they are doing, and be left in peace. What happens when the task isn't done, though? An argument will undoubtedly arise, with never leads to anything good. Making a promise and breaking it only leads to heart ache for those that you let down. If you don't care that you're letting that person, or group of people down, I think it's pretty obvious that you don't actually care about them.

If you want your word to actually have value, stick to it. When you say you're going to do something, in your mind, you have to make it a fact--treat as something that is going to happen, not something that might happen. If you're girlfriend asks you to stop by the store to pick something up, it should be firm in your mind that you're stopping by the store. It's not an "if I have time" thing. Write in your calendar, or whatever you have to do. Just make sure it gets done.

In some cases, someone will ask you to do something that you simply can't. There's nothing wrong with that, granted that you really can't do it and you aren't just blowing them off. Saying you can't do something will hurt much less in the long run than saying you can do something and not being able to. Just make sure that there is no way you can get it done before saying you can't. Keep it a "can't" and not a "don't want to."

Certain things happen that are beyond your control. If you said you were going to stop by the store, but your boss calls a mandatory meeting, it's more important to attend the meeting and keep your job. Since everyone has a cell phone, and most people have smart phones now, there's no reason why you can't send a text, e-mail, or call to explain what happened. It's also a good idea to come up with an alternate plan when sending the update. Instead of, "hey, the boss called a surprise meeting, I can't stop by the store," try, "hey, a meeting just came up at work and I won't have time to stop by the store tonight, I'll stop tomorrow morning."

Whatever the case or scenario, don't ever just blow something off. There's no reason for it and you only make yourself look bad. Anyone you meet will have a lot more respect for you if they know you can be counted on. It's really not that hard of a thing to do. Sure, you may need to practice at it a little bit--after all, all of us struggle with one thing or another--but before long, it will be second nature. You say something, you do it. Simple as that. Before long, women will be referring to you as the knight in shining armor.